


I Want

by Cardgamesonmotorcycles



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-23
Updated: 2013-10-23
Packaged: 2017-12-30 06:47:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1015445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cardgamesonmotorcycles/pseuds/Cardgamesonmotorcycles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryou thinks about how he wants to spend the evening with his boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Want

It’s 7PM on a cool Saturday evening in early September and I want to see my boyfriend.  
Better still, I want to go to a club. I want to drink and laugh and stumble. I want to get to the stage of drunkenness where I feel out of control of my body. I want to watch him dance under the bright lights, feel the music vibrate through my feet to my chest, feel my heart beat and watch his smile grow. I want to watch the way his t-shirt rides up as he jumps to the music, revealing his toned stomach muscles. I want to watch the way his eyes sparkle under strobe lighting and watch as his smooth lips smile from a mixture of alcohol and pure unadulterated joy. I want to watch the single bead of sweat trickle from his white hair down his face as he collapses against a pillar, chest heaving with fatigue. I want to walk home hand in hand with the sun rising ahead of us at 6AM. I want to fall into bed, utterly exhausted but with just enough energy for a few sweet kisses before I fall asleep in his strong arms. I want to wake up to see his peacefully resting form and to take time examining his face. I want him to wake with a content smile and then a gentle kiss as he holds me tighter. I want to spend the day in bed, watching films and laughing.  
A single tear trickles down my cheek as I stare at the vase of white lilies which sits on the table in front of me, a neatly folded card lies in front of them. ‘In sympathy’, the front reads, and it holds a supposedly reassuring image of a dove. The message inside is written in a feminine, curly font, ‘Ryou, Our dearest sympathies on your loss, we’ll be thinking of you. Love, Marik, Yugi and Anzu xxx’  
They act as if he’s not coming back. As if he’s gone for good, that he’d just leave me here alone. I know him better than that. I know him better than all of them. He’ll come back. He has to. He promised.  
I scoff at the card, putting it down on the table with unnecessary force. My jaw sets hard in place and my gaze is steely. It was alright for Marik, he hated his Yami. He was insane, a psychopathic murderer who was created from Mariks internal hatred. Nobody would miss Mariku. Yugi was a fool. He believed his beloved Pharaoh was at peace now, believed he had helped him to solve the mystery of his memories and allow him to rest. I snorted derisively and glared at the card. Yugi at least should understand how I feel. He and his Yami had also been together, but for some unfathomable reason Yugi had been able to let him go after the ceremonial duel which had torn our Yami’s from us and sent them to the afterlife. I figured it was because he didn’t love Yami like I loved Bakura.  
Thinking the name made my breath catch in my throat and fresh tears spill. I glanced up at the clock that hung on the wall, reading the digital display through blurry eyes, 11:32PM. I rubbed my eyes wearily on my sleeve which was already damp with hours of crying. I slowly traipsed up the stairs to my room, leaving behind the cloying smell of the lilies. I practically fell into bed, exhausted despite my lack of physical activity. I felt drained and heavy as I cuddled into the sheets, reaching up to flick of the lightswitch. I lay in the dark, feeling small and alone, my arms felt empty without him. I reached beside the bed for Bakura’s pillow and took it into my arms, curling round it and burrowing into its softness, smelling his scent. If I closed my eyes I could almost believe it was him.


End file.
